January 25, 2009

All around me are familiar faces.

More pictures from that same adventure outside.

I kind of want to do something new and exciting with my hair, but I have mild difficulty finding the time for it. The couple of next Saturdays are already booked with stuff. Not even necessarily things I want to do, but I said I would so that's that. Maybe I'll grow it out until it reaches my waist. I know this girl in my art class who did that. How about I'll donate it to locks of love? What a plan. Plans usually fall threw with me, though. Disheartening fact, really. So! Maybe I should dye it blue. I'd surely stand out, that's for sure. Would mother approve? Highly doubtful. That's okay, I don't really want it blue anyway. Just a thought.

What is going on? It's 6:13 and my eyes are already drooping. I think it might have something to with crying about ten times today. For reasons far past disclosure. Well, some. Others are so silly I'd waste my [and your] time talking [reading] about it.

I, by no means, want to go to school tomorrow. Then again, I, by no means, don't want to end up swimming in make-up work and jeopardizing my grades. Sounds like a lose, lose situation to me. Oh boy, I can't believe I haven't told you guys -- Puja and I dissected a sheep heart in Biology this past Friday. Gross to a point, but if you just manned up, everything was dandy. [Correction: I shouldn't use the word "manned" since these guy lab partners beside us nearly shrieked doing it. It was, kinda funny. ha.] We have a test this upcoming Wednesday for that class. Joy.
I believe my family is calling me to eat dinner real soon. Adios.

January 09, 2009

Tears stop right here.

I tried to write before, but I was disappointed in its quality and thus went on to delete it. I haven't been inspired to say anything before either. Nothing of much note has been happening. I have been extremely tired lately. Even after a 11:30 to 6:20ish worth of sleep I'm barely able to keep my eyes open, much less be entertained and happy about things in life. My apathy is swelling inside me and I don't really know how to deal. I think I'm going to take a break from confiding in friends. Not that they aren't a good outlet I can go to, I just stress over that detail of speaking to them in addition to my problem, which half the time is made out to not to be an ordeal and I'm silly to ever think it was. I over-react. I've come a long to way accept that it may never change. It's merely part of who I am. Therefore I'm taking the initiative to not get into situations where I could conceivable over-react. There's only havoc to be wrecked if I do, and I just can't take that. I'll go see a shrink, (therapist; whatever) if this worsens.

A good piece of news earlier this week: I learned I'm having my drawing of turtles be put on display in the mall. My art teacher loved it, and I had a high-soaring feeling the rest of the day. Getting a 100 on my history exam was an added booster. Next day, it didn't matter. The world moved on. No lasting gratitude; at least not much yet? I'm going to have to get used this. Life doesn't always repeatedly pat you on the back for any single accomplishment. Unless you're Lincoln, or another famous person from history or something.

New schedule at school. I can officially say good-bye to Career Research. I passed with flying colors and there will be no need to repeat that dreadful excuse for a class. Hallelujah. That is until the State Legislature or District School Board goes completely wacko and requires a similar class every year. With this, I can also semi bid ado to Stephen (Lordy, I still don't know how to spell his name!) although we talked the grand total of once and it ended awkardly. Does that count? I still sometimes wonder if I made a lasting impression, but that notion is quickly swept away when I notice him and his girlfriend lip-locking on my way to seventh period. Yeah, I think it's safe to assume not.

To replace that semester class, I have aerobics. On the first day--which was Thursday this week--I recognized a few faces. And to think I had gotten rid of them! A few guys, too. Hey, if that's their choice, so be it. I don't say that out of sake for their cuteness...I think in order for that to work that'd have to actually be attractive. Brutal, but honest. I don't know if I'll make any lifetime long friends out of anyone. That's okay, I'm there to get in shape, not gossip or engage myself in conversations. If I come off as a loner, that's fine as well.

My lips are chapped. Must be due to all this cold weather we're having lately. (Well, it is January after all. What did you expect? To be getting a tan?) I am also pudgier than I want to be. Not much I feel even willing to address that. Aerobics would be one thing, though I probably should be getting out and doing other things.

Tomorrow I am volunteering at my middle school for a lego tournament. There's a chance I'll get to hang with Nikki and Dani there. Why? Well, they're helping out as past of the senior robotics team in charge of running the whole sha-bam. I'm just there since I was asked to be. After that, I get a little break at home, then I go baby-sit. Fun, fun. I think it's been a whole year since I've watched these kids. I'm praying their cousin from Canada isn't staying over again; she was a royal pain. Yeah, I know, I lived to tell the story.

Oh, last note. I recommend the book Burned, Crank, and Impluse by Ellen Hopkins. The books look huge since she tells the story entirely in different styles of poems. They are addicting, and [surprisingly?] fast-paced. An avid reader like myself would tend to finish in around two days, give or take a few hours.

Good night, sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite.