June 18, 2009

It started with the lowlight.

I am listening to The Killers' latest album, "Day & Age". Haven't heard all the tracks yet, though my favorite is Spaceman, for sure.

I'm finally getting around to cleaning my desk after putting it off for a while. This will make it easier to continue my various art projects and just to write thoughts as well. Not everything I think nor experience nor feel can be exposed to the world. At least if it's not anonymous. If it was, there might be different story. But I am either A.) Not clever enough to have a good alias or B.) Want to feel somewhat human and meet people based on how they view the quote unquote real me. Y'know?

That said, I think I need a new journal/notebook to write in. My red one is going to be tossed into a fire, where it can be sufficiently scorched and then its ashes tossed into Lake Okeechobee. That is how strongly I feel it needs to go. I'd probably do even more, say, suffocation and hanging, if it wasn't an inanimate object. If the person who gave it to me even cared for my existence, he wouldn't have abandoned what we had, whatever the hell it was. I know and knew more than I ever let on. He -- of all people -- should have understood that's just how I tick. He's seen me suffer betrayal and he said he'd never do the same. Too bad he did. So who is the liar and hypocrite, now?

I apologize; I needed that out of my system, it's been festering. Anyway.

I think I'm going to make a life list and post a somewhat abbreviated version of it in a module to the side of my posts. Why? Just because. Oh, I got a $60 tin of 48 Prismacolor colored pencils. I think it was worth it. Only problem is any money I've made since buying my camera has already been spent. Back to square one.

As Ed Murrow would say: Good night and good luck.


  1. Spaceman is my favourite, too :)

  2. we were all born at "square one" and, unfotunately, i have never left :p. awesome blog *followed*

  3. I have some cleaning up to do, too. I need to throw out some useless school papers. I'm looking forward to that since my dad bought a new paper shredder. It's so cool; it looks Apple-made, yet it's from Staples.

    I've never liked journals. I prefer blogs since I have no privacy. I share a room with many people. I can't hide anything unfortunately.

    I missed you, too! I hold you in great esteem.