June 17, 2013

Finding myself and every other cliché in the book.

"Sometimes I can here my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living."
-- Jonathan Safran Foer

Recently I've been having identity issues.  I've been dealing with all the typical psychoanalytical, existential bullshit.  And in least eloquent terms, it blows.  Because how do you blog about these things when everyone else is prettier, wittier, healthier, wealthier, and every other -er?  How do you get up and do things when everyone else is just plain better?

I know I must be what changes.  People aren't going to suddenly lose their power to outshine me, or intimidate me.  As Ghandi did not say, "you must be the change you seek in the world." Yeah, I'm trying. 

Even though I'm not good at lists either, here's ideas of what I can do to be ~happier~:
  • Bike to a local library and spend all day there...of course this would have to be on Saturday because M-F I work 8-5 and they're closed Sundays.  Let's try this again.
  • Bike to a local library on a Saturday and spend all day there.
  • Have a James McAvoy movie marathon.  This, as always, roughly translates to watching Becoming Jane and bawling my eyes out.
  • Write more for my music blog.
  • Journal.
  • Review the movies I watch.  Though sometimes I do that here.
  • Actually study for Spanish and Econ since I already own the books.  And this way I can be all "wah-bam, I know my stuff" in the fall.
  • Visit used bookstores.
  • Get excited because Friday is payday and I can un-ironically play this song.
  • I'm going to go now.  I hope you are well.

2 comments:

  1. Gurl, I feel like we ALL feel like this at some point.

    I just want you to know that you're super duper cool. Don't let things get you too down!

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  2. College is the perfect time to "find yourself" so to speak, as cliche as that does sound. But hey, we're growing up, so we should cut ourselves some slack.

    Yeah.... I was thinking I would start studying for orgo this summer. No. Not going to happen.

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